|
Cyber-bullying on increase, say experts
Feb 07, 2010 (Sentinel and Enterprise - McClatchy-Tribune Information Services via COMTEX) --
Worcester District Attorney Joseph D. Early Jr. said his heart broke when he heard from an 11-year-old boy who'd rather get beaten up than tormented over the Internet and through text messages.
At least in a physical fight, there's a start and an end, but when the taunts and humiliation follow a child into their home, it's "torture," and it doesn't stop, Early said this week.
Cyber-bullying -- taunts, insults and harassment over the Internet or cell phone text messages -- has become rampant among young people, in some cases with tragic consequences.
"We just can't rest on this," Early said in a phone interview. "We've got to be aggressive. ... Don't ever think it can't happen to your child."
Early's office is continuing with its push to teach children, parents and educators about cyber-bullying and Internet safety, and he said adults need to bring themselves up to speed on the technologies their children are using, and how to monitor the messages they send and receive.
It's amazing how many children who bully others online don't realize the weight of their words until it's too late, and because groups of kids often gang up on victims, they don't realize the overall impact they have on one another.
"There's more opportunities (for kids to bully others) now, and it's instant," he said. "For some kids it's just totally debilitating. They wake up in the morning just dreading what they're going to see online. They don't want to go to school,
they don't want to turn on the computer."
South Hadley High School student Phoebe Prince, 15, committed suicide last month, after what friends and family members described as a barrage of online bullying taunts, threats and rumors about the girl, who had moved to the Western Massachusetts town from Ireland about six months before.
Last April, Carl Joseph Walker-Hoover, 11, of Springfield, hung himself after being taunted in school and online by students who called him gay and mocked his clothing. His mother had contacted school officials several times on his behalf.
It's everywhere
Derek Randel, a motivational speaker, former teacher and founder of StoppingSchoolViolence.com, said cyber-bullying has become so prevalent with emerging social media, such as Facebook and text messaging, that it has affected every school in every community.
"It's everywhere," he said this week in a phone interview.
Randel said he's saddened, but not surprised by the Massachusetts suicides, and said the public likely doesn't have an idea that there are hundreds of teen suicide attempts to every teen suicide death.
Parents, school officials and police officers need to open their eyes to the problem, and not relate it to the school yard bullying from previous generations -- cyber-bullying doesn't "toughen a kid up," or build character, it can tear a child apart, he said.
"Some adults do think, 'Oh, we had bullies when I was growing up, look how I turned out,'" Randel said. "That is such an old way of thinking. A lot of people do dismiss this quite a bit. ... You have to discuss this before it becomes a problem."
Students sound off
Some members of the Leominster High School student council this week said while they don't perceive cyber-bullying as a major problem in school, they think online communications and text messaging exacerbate rumors and add to conflict among students.
Even though Facebook use and most texting happens outside of school, users can post what they're doing or thinking about for their friends, or the general public, to see -- in the hallways and classrooms, said LHS senior Emily Robison, 18.
"It happens a lot, when people's comments online are talked about the next day in school," she said. "It adds tension between the students."
Part of the problem is that people try to resolve conflict online or over text messages rather than in person, making it easier to use harsher language and insults, said sophomore Ross Potvin, 15.
"It doesn't seem like people talk to each other anymore," he said. "I think it's a bigger problem now than it ever was."
Despite a generation's worth of information on Internet safety, LHS junior Zachary Vaillette, 17, said some teens still don't grasp that everything they put online can be seen by others, and can remain on the Internet forever.
"People put things up without thinking, and they don't realize everyone can see what they wrote," he said. "They need to be more careful."
Social networking sites also allow third parties to jump into an issue between two people, explained LHS junior Lizzie Kelly, 17.
If Person A writes something on Person B's wall -- the interactive part of a Facebook user's profile, where other users can post messages, photos, videos and links -- there's a space for Persons C, D and then some to comment on the message, and it will be viewed by everyone who participated in the message.
"People who would be afraid to say something to your face seem to have the courage to make comments online," Kelly said. "It may be something between you and your best friend, but now all these other people are jumping in."
Sixteen-year-old LHS sophomore Sarah Doyle said it's more common for young people to use profanity or other inappropriate language if they're typing instead of talking.
Back to school
Doyle also said online bullying always comes back to school, regardless of where messages are sent or received.
"You spend most of your time here, anyway," she said. "It's so much easier to say things electronically than in person, but you're going to see that person eventually."
Robison said she can understand why a victim of cyber-bullying would be anxious about going to school the day or weekend after being harassed or taunted online or via text messages.
"It is a distraction," she said. "It makes you feel uncomfortable. You're wondering, 'Are they going to come after me?' I think it causes a lot of stress."
LHS Dean of Students Rebecca Stillman explained school discipline is a confidential matter among school administrators, the student and his or her parents. So someone involved in bullying or harassment would face disciplinary action, but the action would not be made public.
"That's something we don't reveal," she said. "If it comes down to a situation where we involve the police, it's still a very complicated legal matter, especially if the person is a minor."
Stillman said cyber-bullying is "a huge challenge" for school administrators, but pointed out most of the problems happen at home or off campus, and said parents must also be vigilant about what their children are doing online.
"This is not exclusively a school problem," she said. "It's happening in their own homes. We as a culture have to start owning the problem."
Children also need to be aware if they're threatening someone or harassing someone online, they can be charged with a crime, Stillman said.
"Kids are good about saving things, and they've come in with documentation of what the other person said," she said. "I don't think they have a good clear understanding of when it comes down to criminal charges."
Randel said although it may be painful to save insults -- printing out and keeping track of every threat or bullying message in order to "build a case."
Police departments can also retrieve text messages, he said.
Parents don't necessarily have to establish Facebook accounts and "friend" their children, Randel said, noting "We are not our kids' friends."
But they should discuss rules with their kids and build a trusting relationship, where their children can feel comfortable showing messages to their parents if asked, he said.
They should also look for signs of inappropriate computer use. The computer should be in a common area of the home, and not in a bedroom, Randel said.
Warning signs include children minimizing their Web browser screen when parents enter the room, looking "rattled" or anxious while online, erasing browsing history, not wanting to turn on their cell phones in parents' presence and general signs of anxiety about school or computer use, Randel said.
Early also said there are codes and acronyms, such as PIR (parent in room) and POS (parent over shoulder) kids use when typing or texting to their peers -- there are some guidelines for parents and students on cyber-bullying at his Web site, www.worcesterda.com.
And if another parent or a school administrator calls to report your child is bullying another, it's worth looking into, even if you think your kid isn't capable of meanness, Randel said.
"Everybody's tough when they're behind a keyboard," he explained.
To see more of the Sentinel & Enterprise or to subscribe to the newspaper, go to
http://www.sentinelandenterprise.com/. Copyright (c) 2010, Sentinel and
Enterprise, Fitchburg, Mass. Distributed by McClatchy-Tribune Information
Services. For reprints, email tmsreprints@permissionsgroup.com, call
800-374-7985 or 847-635-6550, send a fax to 847-635-6968, or write to The
Permissions Group Inc., 1247 Milwaukee Ave., Suite 303, Glenview, IL 60025, USA.
[ Back To Smart Grid Home's Homepage ]
|